Brownie Nightmares

Today was Em’s last day of school. So she is “home,” for all of three weeks, and then the Fall Preschool starts.

It was a little anti-climatic, I think, but nonetheless, they got to have a little party. Plus she will more than likely have a different teacher next time around, so it was goodbye to sweet Mrs. McCoy. She was a wonderful teacher for Em’s introduction to the whole wide world of school.

Last week there was a little sign-up sheet for their party today and I asked Em what she would like to bring. I was reading down the list, “water, cheese and crackers, cut-up fruit, brownies…”

“BROWNIES! I want to bring BROWNIES, Mama,” she screamed.

Ah, a girl after my own heart. So we signed up for brownies.

Then last night we went over to the neighbor’s house to get the “scoop” on their kitties and fish, since we are taking care of them while they go on vacation. (We also get to “take care” of their pool for the week, yahoo! And it is a really, really nice pool!) So we were swimming, (the kids were, at least) having a glass of wine, (that would be the grown-ups) and visiting.  And time kind of got away from us, so I didn’t get the girls home and in bed until nearly 9:00. And yes, paid for it all day today, cranktankerous girls!

As I was quickly hosing them down in the bath, Em pipes up, “Oh, Mom! Don’t forget we have to make brownies for school tomorrow!”

*#@%!.  I had forgotten. Of course.

So I shuffled them off to bed and ran downstairs to make a couple batches of brownies. Pulled them out, ran to bed myself and thought all was well.

And then I had “brownie” nightmares. The entire night. In between Emma waking me up (a grand total of 7 times) I would get back to sleep I would have some snippet of a dream that involved those stupid brownies.

The first dream was that the brownies had nuts in them and made half the class sick. After I woke up with a start, and then realized I had in fact, NOT, put nuts into them, I drifted back to sleep.

I think Em woke me up once or twice in there, and then I had a dream that Ad had knocked the whole plate of brownies on the floor, and I had to “smoosh” them back into squares because I didn’t have time to make any more.

And, cue Em, who wakes me up because she had to go the bathroom, then I realized Addie hadn’t been anywhere near the brownies, so it was, just a dream. All is still ok.

And finally in that early-morning, kind of “floating in-and-out” sleep, I dreamt that I had entirely forgotten to make the brownies and was running around trying to figure out what to do.

As I woke up from that one, and reassured myself that I did indeed make the brownies and they were ready to go, I tried to figure out why all this stress over some cocoa, sugar and eggs?

I came to the conclusion that I so want to be that Mom who can do it all; bake brownies, have a fantastically clean house (where I can serve brownies off of the floor!), look all pulled-together – you know that calm, cool, collected Mom that seems to just have her crap sorted out. I want to be her, but it is just so hard. And it has been especially hard this week.

It isn’t an earth-shattering conclusion, I know, but I think I just need to let something go. I feel like I strive on having a “full plate.” I seem better organized and I love being able to look back on the day and really feel like I accomplished something, if I have a looming “to-do” list. But really is it worth it?

I mean will Emma remember that I made brownies for her to bring into her “Last Day” party?

Well, let’s not answer that. Because knowing the memory on that girl, she will.

Maybe I just need to find a good bakery where I can buy a decent batch of brownies and pass them off as homemade, and call it a day.

Slightly Controlled

We are one step above “barely controlled chaos” this week. Holding steady at “slightly controlled.”

I know, I know! It has been a a week of photo-blogging, so in order to squelch the complaining, I am attempting to actually write a little something. You, people! I offer up pictures of adorable, little girls and yet you are never happy. 🙂

Anyhow, let’s see. It is Thursday (Thursday! We made it to Thursday!), and thankfully we have had some great lunch/playdates with old friends that we hadn’t seen in a long time. Both yesterday and today, and they more than made up for the not-so-fun things that happened this week. Like, say…locking ourselves out of the house and getting a speeding ticket.

Other great stuff that has happened. J’s project is live! Yahoo!! You can go see it in all of it’s glory, it really does look great. It has made for one incredibly long week for J. since they are basically sitting around waiting for something to happen, so they can fix it.

It also meant that he got to shave the beard yesterday! Hallelujah! Although now, he looks kind of funny. (Not ha-ha funny, I guess we had just become accustomed to his manly facial hair.) So he’s thinking he needs to work on something in between “babyface” and “grizzly Adams.” I agree. I think he looked great here. My m-i-l and I think he looked a little like Tim McGraw in that pic, sans the cowboy hat (and a little cuter, too!).

So J. is still around, we are still waiting to get to spend more than a quick hour or two with him at a time, but at least we can see the light at the end of the tunnel. His hard work has paid off and we are very proud of him.

Em’s last day of summer school is tomorrow. It is incredible to write that. It seems like we just dropped her off on her first day. And it is also remarkable the change in her. Some good, some bad – mostly good, though. The stuff that comes out of that girl’s mouth – it is so funny. A few conversations just from the past couple of weeks…

—————–

(We are in Pei Wei, this Asian restaurant, one of our favorite places to eat. I am trying to herd the girls to the bathroom to go potty before we leave.)

E: Mama, you have to creep like this. (And she is walking kind of on her tiptoes, like she is sneaking into a room.)
M: Uh, ok. Why are we “creeping.”
E: Because! We are secret Asians, Mama.
M: Um, (Gulp. Peek around to see how many “Asian” people are listening to this exchange? And a little cautiously ask…) what is a “secret Asian,” Em?
E: You know those kind of people, Mom? The kind that try to find things? We are secret Asians trying to find the bathroom!
(Ah, then it comes to me…)
M: You mean secret agents?
E: Yeah, Mom! Like the Backyardigans. Secret Asians!

The Backyardigans are indeed very multicultural, who knew they were all Secret Asians, though?

—————————–

(In the car, after the great “lock-out” of the week. We do have spare keys…long story. Anyhow they were not available when we needed them and I walked out the door, after having to go back in after BEAR, and my keys were left lying on the coffee table.)

E: Hey, Mom! Remember when you had to puuu-sh out the screen and then push me through the kitchen window, I had to jump off the counters and run around to unlock the door?
M: Um, like 5 minutes ago, before we were late for school?
E: Yeah. Ha. That was fun! If you ever leave your keys inside, I can do it again. It was fun!
M: Yes. Very. Fun.

—————————–

(Finally, after the cop pulled me over. Hard to believe, I know, but I was indeed speeding. Late to drop Em off for preschool. I did deserve a ticket and didn’t even try to talk my way out of this one. But it was only the second speeding ticket of my life, the last one was a good 10-11 years ago. I know, I said it was hard to believe and I also know that I am pretty lucky.)

E: Mom! That police officer is on a motorcycle!
M: Yes, he is.
E: Why did he turn his lights and his woo-woop sound on?
M: Because he wanted Mommy to pull over. I was speeding. Going too fast.
E: Why did he take your credit card?
M: It was my license, Em. He is going to give Mommy a ticket.
E: Hey! We have tickets! Remember when we went to see that…mmm…what was it called, Mama? The movie with the polar bear?
M: Yes. It was Arctic Tale. We did have a ticket for that. But this is a different kind of ticket. This is a ticket where Mommy has to pay money (probably a lot!) because she wasn’t following the rules.
E: Maybe he can just give you a timeout, Mommy. Just tell him you are sorry and you won’t be speeding no more. It’ll be ok.
M: Yeah. Speeding tickets are kind of like timeouts for grown-ups, Em. It will be ok.

Such beautiful, sweet innocence. If only a timeout could work on all of our life problems.

Cuteness times 4?!

It might be cuteness overload. J and I are getting to see what having 4 children would be like. As much as I love Little Em and Connor, I am very thankful that we get to send them back at the end of the weekend. Four is hard work! And they are being great – very well behaved, I just can’t imagine what it would be like if all four were having an “off” day at the same time. Yikes.

four_amigos.jpg

Anyhow – that is what we are doing this weekend. Just chillin’ and enjoying the sun. Hope you are all having a great weekend. We’ll see you Michiganders in 3 days!

dsc_0023.jpg

It’s Freaky Friday the 13th!

Not that I’m superstitious or anything, but I always think it is cool when it is Friday the 13th. Remember that movie Freaky Friday? Not the remake from a few years ago, but the original, old 70’s one that they used to show during the Friday assemblies at school.

I always thought while watching the movie – “how cool would it be to switch places with a grown-up, right now!”

Oh, what a poor little naive kid I was! Although sitting here now, and trying to come up with someone I would like to switch places with, I am coming up empty.

I am not sure there is anyone I would like to trade places with. Nobody seems like they have a better deal going on than I do. I’m really quite content being “grown-up” Carrie, wife to J., Mommy to Em and Ad, sister and daughter.

That is good feeling, in a “freaky” kind-of way.

Do you have someone you’d like to trade places with for a day? Do tell!

Heat – Theme Thursday

Tracey’s theme for today is Heat.

Around here (where it is pretty much hot all summer long!) the heat has forced us to keep cool by playing in the wading pool, living in our swimsuits and eating tomatoes, fresh off the plant, still warm from the sun.

heat_tt.jpg

Addie has been eyeing this tomato for weeks. And she was so excited to sink her teeth into it when I finally gave her the go-ahead.

For a trippy little blast from the past, check this out…

em_tomato.jpg

Emma, 3 years ago. She was 18 months (about 4 months younger than Addie is here). Same swimsuit. Documentation of her first tomato from our garden. Cool, huh?

This was a non-digital pic – remember those? Shot in b&w and then scanned in with a not-so-great scanner, so the quality is not as great. But I think it is such a cool coincidence. Totally not planned, at all!

My wandering mind.

I just can’t seem to focus on work today. I need to. I really need to get all three projects done before we go home to Michigan next week, but I just feel an overwhelming urge to procrastinate. I have 4 hours this afternoon to power through my work, and instead I am sitting here blogging, reading blogs, online shopping…anything to avoid the real work at hand.

Ad and I had a beautiful morning together, maybe that is why I am feeling all relaxed and unable to concentrate. We dropped Em off at school and then enjoyed our “mommy and me” time together. It was so nice and she is such an amazing kid! Of course I knew that already, but she really blossoms and is such a funny, sweet girl when the focus is solely on her.

And…big news! Pants dry all morning and a pee-pee on a “big” potty – not a potty chair, but an honest-to-goodness toilet in a public restroom. When we were leaving, she was “high-fiving” me as I told her how proud of her I was, and all she said was, “Emma!” I asked, “Should go pick up Em and tell her?” And A. said (so sweetly), “Oh yes, Mama!”

When we did pick Em up, it was this very lavish reunion like we hadn’t seen her in three days instead of three hours. The girls were hugging and Em was talking a mile-a-minute about her day and her new friend. And Addie looked up at Em and said “pee-pee on the potty, Emma!”  And so I told Em that Ad had dry pants and had gone pee-pee – and I was so unprepared for Em’s reaction, I almost cried.

She put her arm around Ad all protective-like and said, “Oh, Addie. I’m so proud of you!” and then gave her a kiss on her cheek, as Addie just sat there beaming up at Em.

It may be one of the most precious moments I have ever witnessed this far between the two of them. Addie so excited and proud to tell her big sister, and her big sister so genuinely proud and excited for her.

Dear God, I love those two girls.

Crafty Tuesdays

Okay, so I have decided to institute “Crafty Tuesdays.” I need to have some sort of accountability in my crafting life. When I have projects for work, I know that I am accountable to my boss and the client. I go to the gym because I am accountable to the scale and being healthy for the girls. (And making my pants fit!) And I do laundry, clean the house, make meals because I must with the family depending on me.

I figure if I need to have something to post for all of you to see each week, then maybe I will re-prioritize and work on my scrapping again. My intent is to have Addie’s first year scrapbook done by her 2nd birthday.

There. I have now written it down, and you all have to hold me accountable for getting it done. We have 2 months from yesterday.

Last night I skipped my usual veg-out session in front of the TV and didn’t even read one blog on my laptop. Instead, I started out getting some of my scrap stuff organized and I even got 3 different layouts done! Plus I realized how much I missed being creative for myself, instead of just for my job.

I know that I love other “crafty” people’s blogs when they show their work. It is inspiring and great to “lift” some good ideas. So I hope you are inspired a little, too – or at least like looking at sweet pictures of my girls!

layout1.jpg

layout2.jpg

layout3.jpg

So I’m still playing with the best way to show-off the layouts. I don’t have a large enough scanner to scan them in – and I, of course, took the pics at 11pm last night, not great lighting. So I’ll play with that in the upcoming weeks and see what we can come up with.

Yes, I didn’t work solely on A.’s book last night either. But the pics of Em and Papa were just calling me, I had to scrap them. And look how tiny and sweet Addie used to be! Ahhh….yeah, it is fun to relive all of our past few years as I print pictures, create layouts and journal the memories.

I also finished another craft project that I’m so excited about – but I can’t show it to you, yet! It is a birthday gift for my mother-in-law, and I know she reads this (Hi, Nena!), and she isn’t getting the gift until next week when we go back to Michigan. Maybe that will have to be next week’s Crafty Tuesday project.

What are you doing this Saturday?

Ok, so I was all set to regale you with funny little stories of Em and Addie when I just got an email from my Dad and I decided that it deserved to be, and would be, the blog topic of the day instead. (Don’t worry, I’ll save the cute E.&A. stories for another day.)

So the email was one of those mass “story” little emails that I usually dismiss as having “seen it a thousand times” and delete it before I even get through the first sentence. But this one was different. I haven’t it and it really struck a chord with me.

Our little family kind of has a Saturday “tradition” – that we don’t do every Saturday, but I just realized why it seems so important to me. It started as E. and J. going out to get bagels and coffee for us and lately it has turned into all of us going out to have a little breakfast. I love it because after 5 days of barely seeing J. and dealing with the girls, it gives me a little break. (And I guess there is the fact that a Noah’s salt bagel and a nonfat Mocha is pretty much my most perfect breakfast, too. But that is beside the point.)

We always sit outside, enjoy our breakfast, E. and A. yell at the pigeons (“chigeons” is what A. calls them – kind of a cross between chicken and pigeon!), read the paper, make friends with the other kids around, or just people watch. It is really the simplest thing – but I really do look forward to it and after reading this story I now can point to the reason for my joy in our Saturday routine.

(It is kind of long…but so worth it. Keep reading!)

3900 Saturdays
The older I get, the more I enjoy Saturday mornings. Perhaps it’s the quiet solitude that comes with being the first to rise, or maybe it’s the unbounded joy of not having to be at work. Either way, the first few hours of a Saturday morning are most enjoyable.

A few weeks ago, I was shuffling toward the garage with a steaming cup of coffee in one hand and the morning paper in the other. What began as a typical Saturday morning turned into one of those lessons that life seems to hand you from time to time. Let me tell you about it:

I turned the dial up into the phone portion of the band on my ham radio in order to listen to a Saturday morning swap net. Along the way, I c ame across an older sounding chap, with a tremendous signal and a golden voice. You know the kind; he sounded like he should be in the broadcasting business. He was telling whom-ever he was talking with something about “a thousand marbles.” I was intrigued and stopped to listen to what he had to say.

“Well, Tom, it sure sounds like you’re busy with your job. I’m sure they pay you well but it’s a shame you have to be away from home and your family so much. Hard to believe a young fellow should have to work sixty or seventy hours a week to make ends meet. It’s too bad you missed your daughter’s “dance recital” he continued. “Let me tell you something that has helped me keep my own priorities.” And that’s when he began to explain his theory of a “thousand marbles.”

“You see, I sat down one day and did a little arithmetic. The average person lives about seventy-five years. I know, some live more and some live less, but on average, folks live about seventy-five years.

“Now then, I multiplied 75 times 52 and I came up with 3900, which is the number of Saturdays that the average person has in their entire lifetime. Now, stick with me, Tom, I’m getting to the important part…It took me until I was fifty-five years old to think about all this in any detail”, he went on, “and by that time I had lived through over twenty-eight hundred Saturdays.” “I got to thinking that if I lived to be seventy-five, I only had about a thousand of them left to enjoy. So I went to a toy store and bought every single marble they had. I ended up having to visit three toy stores to round up 1000 marbles. I took them home and put them inside a large, clear plastic container right here in the shack next to my gear.”

“Every Saturday since then, I have taken one marble out and thrown it away. I found that by watching the marbles diminish, I focused more on the really important things in life. There is nothing like watching your time here on this earth run out to help get your priorities straight.”

“Now let me tell you one last thing before I sign-off with you and take my lovely wife out for breakfast. This morning, I took the very last marble out of the container. I figure that if I make it until next Saturday then I have been given a little extra time. And the one thing we can all use is a little more time.”

“It was nice to meet you Tom, I hope you spend more time with your family, and I hope to meet you again here on the band. This is a 75 Year old Man, K9NZQ, clear and going QRT, good morning!”

You could have heard a pin drop on the band when this fellow signed off. I guess he gave us all a lot to think about. I had planned to work on the antenna that morning, and then I was going to meet up with a few hams to work on the next club newsletter.

Instead, I went upstairs and woke my wife up with a kiss. “C’mon honey, I’m taking you and the kids to breakfast.” “What brought this on?” she asked with a smile. “Oh, nothing special, it’s just been a long time since we spent a Saturday together with the kids. And hey, can we stop at a toy store while we’re out? I need to buy some marbles.

My favorite line is “There is nothing like watching your time here on this earth run out to help get your priorities straight.

What could be more true? Now what are you doing still sitting here reading? Go find your spouse, kids, friends. Get your priorities in line. We are nearly halfway to losing another marble.

Small Change Month 6/7

Aw man, I am so far behind. It is the 2nd week of July already!

So a little recap. Last month’s Small Change Challenge was to do a “clean-up” project somewhere. The girls and I cleaned up some trash at Lacy Park one day and they are a little bit obsessed about it.  I’d say A. alone has tried to pick up at least her weight in trash over the past month. We’ve gone through lots of wipes and Purell.

This month’s challenge is equally as simple. You can do just a little or go all gung-ho and crazy. The month 7 Small Change Challenge, should you choose to accept is this:

“Our challenge this month is to give something to charity.  Anything, to any charity.  So, you can log onto your favorite charity’s website and give them a couple of bucks right now and be done with it.  Or you can donate your time, or the clothes your kids had the unmitigated gall to outgrow halfway through the season, or whatever works for you.”

Easy right? So let’s do it! Beth, founder and driving force behind Small Change is donating her hair to one of the charities that makes wigs for children with cancer. How cool is that? So I might not be able to do anything as grand as that – but I’m going to scrounge around and see what we can come up with. How about you?