I am sitting in my “office away from home” waiting for my project to upload. My big project that I have been stressing over for weeks now. It is finished. Well, for the time being, until the client sends back a list of demanding changes, but finished for this week, at least.

And then?

I’ve got a few hours to treat myself.  Well, I am running all of those errands that are easier to do sans girlies. Like recycling, dropping off the Goodwill boxes, getting a car wash. Definitely in that order, too. The cardboard is making my car stink so it needs to go first, and whatever toy it is that “talks” when I go over any bump is driving me a bit crazy, so it needs to be donated, pronto. And, wow! Is my car is in dire need of a good vacuum.  So every surface needs to be clear for the ultimate in vacuuming efficiency.

And then?

I get to do some real fun things. Like get a haircut! By the way, when did this start rating as a relaxing way to spend an hour or two? I guess right about the time I no longer had even ten minutes to brush out my hair, much less style it in any way. But they do this amazing massage during the shampoo…it is worth the haircut just for that – not to mention the shagginess that has taken over my head.

I know I am very lucky to have a job that I can do from home after the girls are in bed. And I’m so very lucky to have Denise two afternoons a week so that I can work. And I’m lucky to have two girls that, for the most part, are pretty amazing and I love spending time with them.

But why do a few truly “free” hours make me feel so incredibly giddy? I am almost heady with the prospect of not having any responsibilities for the afternoon. Free to do whatever Mommy needs or wants.

And then?

This incredibly sweet little girl just came in with her mom and my heart feels like it is going to just pound out of my chest. Just watching her makes me miss E. and A.

I just spent the morning with them, and left them not even more than an hour and a half ago. Yet, I’m already counting down the hours til I go home to bathe them, snuggle with them and put them to bed.

How can that happen just like that – really in an instant?