Category Archives: Crazy Mommy

And then?

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I am sitting in my “office away from home” waiting for my project to upload. My big project that I have been stressing over for weeks now. It is finished. Well, for the time being, until the client sends back a list of demanding changes, but finished for this week, at least.

And then?

I’ve got a few hours to treat myself.  Well, I am running all of those errands that are easier to do sans girlies. Like recycling, dropping off the Goodwill boxes, getting a car wash. Definitely in that order, too. The cardboard is making my car stink so it needs to go first, and whatever toy it is that “talks” when I go over any bump is driving me a bit crazy, so it needs to be donated, pronto. And, wow! Is my car is in dire need of a good vacuum.  So every surface needs to be clear for the ultimate in vacuuming efficiency.

And then?

I get to do some real fun things. Like get a haircut! By the way, when did this start rating as a relaxing way to spend an hour or two? I guess right about the time I no longer had even ten minutes to brush out my hair, much less style it in any way. But they do this amazing massage during the shampoo…it is worth the haircut just for that – not to mention the shagginess that has taken over my head.

I know I am very lucky to have a job that I can do from home after the girls are in bed. And I’m so very lucky to have Denise two afternoons a week so that I can work. And I’m lucky to have two girls that, for the most part, are pretty amazing and I love spending time with them.

But why do a few truly “free” hours make me feel so incredibly giddy? I am almost heady with the prospect of not having any responsibilities for the afternoon. Free to do whatever Mommy needs or wants.

And then?

This incredibly sweet little girl just came in with her mom and my heart feels like it is going to just pound out of my chest. Just watching her makes me miss E. and A.

I just spent the morning with them, and left them not even more than an hour and a half ago. Yet, I’m already counting down the hours til I go home to bathe them, snuggle with them and put them to bed.

How can that happen just like that – really in an instant?

You don’t forget how, right?

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I had a whole long, boring post all cued up about our long, not so boring week, but it bored me just thinking about it, so I’m sparing you the details. Here is the condensed version.

Went to ob/gyn. Had a little procedure. Passed out cold and did that little freaky seizure-y thing I do. Pretty traumatic on my body. Was puking sick all day Tuesday and Wednesday. In the midst of keeping girls happy, shuttling to school and finishing two projects. Finally back to normal. I think.

Much more succinct and a little more fun to read it that way, believe me.

Anyhow, the biggest news for the week is my new baby!

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My Christmas present. My guess is it is a bit difficult to do a triathlon on a spin bike or an old mountain bike. So I am the proud new owner of a road bike.

I haven’t taken it out yet, just around our house and in the driveway. You’d think I’d be out on the road all rarin’ to go, right? Why haven’t I been?

I’m terrified of it.

Seriously. Look how skinny these tires are.

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And the first time I get my shoes clipped into the pedals and forget to unclip when I stop….I’m so going to bust open my head or break a body part.

They say you never forget how to ride a bike, right?

We’ll see. We are going to test that out this weekend. But I do think it needs a name. Anybody got any good ideas?

It’s only Wednesday? Really?

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It is only Wednesday. It has been the loooongest week. I only wish that I was getting some stuff done in this seemingly never-ending week.

J. is gone this week. Again. It is the third straight week, but who is counting? And I know he is just as tired of traveling as we are of having him gone. And I also know that I shouldn’t be complaining, but…well, just indulge me. A few minutes, please?

Oh, I’m trying so very hard to be patient. But I believe I used up my very last ounce of patience. All gone. Oh, about 8am, on Monday morning. The girls have just been bickering about every last thing.

I have even pulled out the big guns, “Santa is watching and not going to stop at our house this year.” It works for about 10 minutes, then it is promptly forgotten. No amount of begging, pleading, or timeouts are working.

And the whining. My God, the whining! It is making my ears bleed.

And….ok, I’m….done. No more complaining.

So let’s look at a few sweet photos from a birthday party that we attended this past weekend, shall we?

Let us remember the sweet little girls that are hidden somewhere under the little monsters that seem to have taken over their bodies this week.

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Today is another day. Monsters be gone.

Why I run…

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I was reading an article in my Runner’s World today while I was waiting at the doctor’s office. It was written by a guy proclaiming that while he runs, he is “one with nature,” he has a “clear head” and exists in a completely “Zen-like state.”

Ha! Double Ha! That is so not why I run. In fact, I don’t think I have ever been in any sort of Zen-like state while running. My mind goes a million miles a minute, it is a bit schizo. Here is a glimpse of what went through my mind – my conversation with myself – while on my run this evening.

Let’s count the number of topic changes, shall we?

-Ahhhh, tonight is perfect running weather.

-And it isn’t nearly as dark as it was the other night, must be because it is so cloudy.

-Man, I hope it doesn’t rain tomorrow – I really want to take the girls to the park. They need to go to the park. They haven’t been to the park in over a week now.

-Which park should we go to…maybe the little one by the gym.

-I can’t believe that house I love so, is still for sale. Well, actually I can – it is darn expensive even for our neighborhood.

-Oh, I love their wreaths. So pretty.

-I wonder if anyone can tell that all of the wreaths on our french doors are not the exact same size? Two of them aren’t that much smaller, but a little.

-Crap, I just felt a drop. I think it is going to start to rain. Either that or I just peed on myself. Man, having two 8 pound babies lounging on your bladder for 9 months each really does reek havoc on a system.

-I do like my new running shorts, though. They don’t seem to bunch up like my other ones.

-Wow! The Christmas lights on one of my other favorite houses look really pretty.

-I have to remember to look up that stupid Puppy Alarm Clock online tonight. Why didn’t I just buy it one of the 200+ times we looked at it while in Target? I’ve had over seven months. Emma will be so disappointed if there is not an alarm clock under the tree.

-Whoa…the lights on that house are a disaster. Looks like a gingerbread house on crack. Did they take every different color of lights and every different strand-type of lights and just throw them out there to see what would happen? Yikes.

-So, when I get home – I need to make sure that I email those comps to Russell. I’m just not sure what I don’t like about them still, but I’m sure he will like something about one of them – I need to get them to him.

-I also really need to finish up the Christmas cards. Such a huge relief – the minute they are all mailed. Maybe by tomorrow night they could be ready to go. That would be nice.

-Guy! I’m not going to run out in the street, just go. I can’t see you – I can’t tell if you can see me. Just go, friend!

-This is a pretty dark little section of our street.

-I’m almost home, though.

-Running in the dark is good for my time. Makes me definitely run faster. Or maybe it was the two cups of coffee? Yeah, probably the coffee.

-Only a few more blocks. My knees actually feel pretty good.

-And no rain. So the drop on my leg must have been from a mud puddle, or I really did pee on myself a little. I”m going to go with the puddle. The mud puddle.

-I wonder if Meesh and I could really swing a fun get-away for her 30th Birthday. That would be super fun. Where should we go, how long could I get away for? If it was during the summer, Denise could probably help out.

-What am I going to do for Christmas for Denise? It should be a good present. She totally deserves it.

-Ugh…what am I going to get for Jamie? I’ve got nothin’ here.

-I’m so excited he comes home tonight. I hope he gets home before the girls go to bed.

-Oh, but it is a good TV night. Early to bed for girlies. We’ll see. Maybe they can stay up. Remember to ask D. if they rested today.

-I have to take my car in tomorrow for the maintenance check. I could do it while E. is at school and just take A. with me. That might work.

-Okay, that was a good run tonight. Gotta turn on our balcony Christmas lights.

-What am I going to blog about tonight?

Child Labor Laws Don’t Apply Here

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I think I may be in the running for a Mother-of-the-Week award after today.

I had a conference call that was scheduled before my sitter was going to be here. So I did what any good mom would do. I bribed the girls with a movie and popcorn so that they would be quiet for 45 minutes.

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Oh, did I mention? It was 10 o’clock. In the morning.

And then after that, I put them to work washing all of the dishes in the kitchen.

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I’m expecting my award. Any day now.

Our “gift” of an extra hour?

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Usually you’ll find me complaining that I need a few more hours every single day to get everything done, or at least a couple of hours added to the week.

So today we were handed the lovely “gift” of an extra hour and yet, if I might, I still need want to complain for a wee moment here.

It was never-ending. The longest freaking day, e-v-e-r. I’m ready for bed and it is only 7:45pm.

J. and I got to go out to see some live music last night (Matt Nathanson at the Troubadour – very, very cool show!) but by the time we got back, cut the babysitter loose, and just sat to unwind for a few minutes it was very nearly 1am. Which, with the time change is only midnight, and that, albeit a little late for us old folks, is a fairly decent time to get to bed. But then little Miss Emma was up at 6am. I know, I know – it was 7am to her body, her normal rise-and-shine time, but ah…man. It just felt so early.

And then both girls were just all off-kilter today. And then there was “le nap resistance!” (You have to say it with a furious-sounding, French accent – for it to really be effective.) Two hours of fierce resisting any sort of nap. And when we finally gave in and got them up – it was only 3 o’clock. Three more hours until we could even conceivably think of trying to put them back to bed.

We ran to the park, and I let them play for awhile, hoping that would wear them out, but it only made Addie completely slap-happy. J. got some really funny video of her, at least. I’ll get it from him and put it up later this week.

Anyhow – the girls are soundly sleeping. Now I need to go get ready for the week and recover from the “extra hour” trauma.

Where are all the lows?

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Our life is usually a little, gently sloping rollercoaster, some highs, some lows. Apparently we are heading for one doozy of a hill because we have been on nothing but a high, all week long.

To start the week off the girls and I were on a “Daddy high” when he safely arrived back home from his week + of travels. It was a serious love-fest around here Monday night and has been the rest of the week, when Daddy is not passed out from sheer exhaustion. It is so nice to have him home and I have returned Emma to her own bed and J’s cricket bat back to his closet. (A few crazy noises one of the nights while he was gone, had given it a premier spot within arms reach of my side of the bed.)

The middle of the week sent the girls into a serious “sugar high” with all of the Halloween festivities and candy. Candy. Oh my word – do we have candy. We got all dressed up. Mommy and Daddy, too. Emma was insistent on me having a costume, so while we were in Target the other day (and their costumes were all on sale!) I told her she could pick one out for me. Her first attempt was a bar wench costume, with the shirt cut down to here, and the skirt cut up to here. She said, “it is like a girl pirate, Mama!”

I told her they didn’t have my size (thankfully they didn’t) and she tried again. The second time around she picked out a queen costume. Nice long skirt, super cheap. Ding, ding, ding. We had a winner.

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It was fun to get dressed up with them and yes, that is glitter that you see on every inch of each of us. Apparently queens, princesses and fairies all are very glittery. I was not aware, as I’m sure you were not. But now we all know. And we also know to put the glitter up, far, far out of the reach of little 2-year olds. Yeah. She still has glitter in her ears, and I still have about an inch of glitter covering my house. At any rate, we had a good time and Em and Ad got a little prize at one of our neighbors’ for being the “best dressed.” Very cute.

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And Daddy was a pirate, of course. We trick-o-treated around the block and the girls came away with quite a load of candy. They have each had maybe 2 pieces of it. I just threw our Easter basket candy away, so I’m guessing that this batch will last us til next Easter, at least.

Addie totally caught on to the whole routine and even had her “Trick Or Treats” “Thank Yous” and “Happy Halloweens” at all the appropriate moments. It was so sweet. But their favorite part of the whole night was when we got back to the house and they got to hand out candy. They loved that part and both wanted to give away handfuls to all the kids. I had to keep telling them “only 2 pieces for each kid.” And then Emma would say, “or three, right Mama?” It is hard to say no to them being so happy to give to others.

So no naps, and a late night led to a little bit of an off-kilter morning yesterday and then the chin-splitting incident. Which all just pushed everyone into a little bit of an “adrenaline high.” We went to the gym, lunch and were on our way to Trader Joe’s for some groceries and Addie had those “sparkly” shoes on from Halloween. She had already tripped two or three times before we even got to the store, I am not sure what the problem with them is. She was sitting on the bottom shelf of the basket while I was picking out some groceries and she tried to get up, tripped over her shoe and face-planted right on her chin.

At first it didn’t even bleed. She cried for a few minutes and then I realized it was bleeding, and then gushing. So I got it to let up, put a band-aid on it (first-aid kit in the car, so handy yet again!), and we finished shopping. She was smiling, all seemed ok. When we got back to the car with the groceries, I peeled the band-aid off just to see how it was doing and it started bleeding again and I realized, it was a bit of a gaping hole. So I decided to take her in just to make sure she didn’t need stitches, or get them if she did.

Luckily Michelle was with us and took our groceries and Em back to the house to stay with Denise, and Ad and I trekked to the ER. Like I said, 3 hours later, they basically super-glued her chin together and she was/is as good as new. She was fantastic at the ER, though. I really can’t believe that kid sometimes. She hung out, got stickers from all the nurses and was completely cooperative. One male nurse came in and was checking her chin (and her puppy’s chin, he got a band-aid and boo-boo, too!) and she just looked at me and said, “I’m gonna be ok, right Mama?” I don’t know if she was trying to convince herself of it or trying to tell the nurse she didn’t really need to be looked at. She was not as fond of the doctor since he was a formidable fellow and a little gruff. But she still did great. I’ll have to try to take a pic of our first trip to the ER for Addie. I had forgotten that it isn’t our first ER trip, Kim reminded me of Emma’s first flesh wound incident when was attacked by a bird at the Playboy Mansion. (Yes, it truly is as bizarre a story as it sounds!) She was only 18 months old and that was our first official trip. Ha!

You know when it seems like the week is going by in slow motion, but then you look back on it and it seems to have gone so fast and you did so much? That is kind of what this week has been like. So I’m really hoping for a low-key weekend. We really need it. A little recuperation, rest and hopefully a good showing from our football team tomorrow. That would be the perfect ending to our week of highs.

The Week in Review

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I have all kinds of things to write about today, so I’ll just do this post “Reader’s Digest-style” and hit the highlights of the week.

Emma Misses Her Daddy
We all do. But E., the clever little monkey, realized that if she says she misses her Daddy and acts very sad, she gets a little more attention and love. And she has been using it to her advantage all week long. When J. got ready to leave on Sunday night, Em had a little meltdown and was sobbing, “But I miss you already, Daddy.” Which, of course, broke J.’s heart and he was trying to console her while the car to take him to the airport was waiting out in the driveway. So after he left, I cuddled with Emma and we talked about some fun things we could do to make the time go faster this week, (and the promise of sleeping in Mommy’s bed) and soon she was happy and sleeping again.

But…every time she has been in trouble or in timeout this week, she has turned on the tears and blurted out, “I miss my Daddy!” For the first few days I gave her a reprieve, but now it is just getting ridiculous. When she has her hands over her eyes, crying, but looks through the fingers to see what kind of reaction she is getting from me…I think I’m being played a little bit.

She did win some brownie points the other night when I was putting her to sleep in my bed. She was all warm and snuggly and she put her hand to my cheek and said, “I like it when it is just us, Mommy. I really like sleeping with you, too.”

I know she doesn’t want it to be “just us” most of the time, but for that little moment it was nice.

Addie is “practically perfect in every way”
A. had her 2-year checkup yesterday and the doctor just kept exclaiming how perfect she was. She exceeds every one of her developmental milestones, she is 50-60th percentile in both height and weight, and our doctor just could not get over her vocabulary and mastery/understanding of our conversations. At one point when I was relaying her typical diet to the doctor, she asked how many fruits and veggies a day A. normally eats. And Addie pipes up, “I like broccoli. Yes!” The doctor just looked at me in complete shock. I don’t know if it was the fact that A. really does like broccoli, or that she happened to contribute so willingly and well to the conversation.

When the doctor was doing the examination, she would tell A. “Okay, now I’m going to check your ears. Is that ok?” And A. would sort of quietly nod and just tilt her ear up towards the doctor. Not a peep. I was so relieved and so proud of her. The doctor said at the end, “Simply extraordinary. I wish all of my patients were this great. She is absolutely perfect.”

I agree with her, I would only add “practically” in front of that perfect.

She was sitting on the potty today and did her “business” in the appropriate place and I told her “Great job, I’m very proud of you, Addie!” And she looks at me very seriously and says, “No poopy in my pants! No poopy in a cup or a plate, either.”

Um, did she just hear me retelling that story too many times? I had assumed that the cup was just in the wrong place at the wrong time, but did she in fact mean to do it? In a cup?

Yeah, “practically perfect” is much more fitting for her, I think.

Mommy Is Now Most Certainly Certifiably Insane
No, it is not all entirely just from this long week sans Daddy.

I have been looking for a little inspiration in the workout arena for awhile now. I’m kinda stuck in a rut. I keep thinking that I will try to run another marathon. But honestly, my knees are really, really creaky, they probably would be sorely unhappy with 25+ mile weeks again. And the amount of time and effort it requires to train for a marathon – it was hard when I was doing it without kids, I just don’t think I have it in me.

So instead? I registered for the inaugural Pasadena Triathlon. Shouldn’t require as much training, right?
Ha.HA.HA!

I told you I was  quite possibly on the slippery slope to becoming insane. I figure with all of the spin classes I do, and the occasional running, I just need to step it up a bit and add some swimming. I think I can do it. And I have until March. So send me some encouraging stories about friends and family who have completed a sprint triathlon. I am particularly interested in how you transition from the pool to the bike to the run. Should be an interesting ride, that’s for sure.

But I feel like now that you all know, I can’t back out. Right?

I’m Crippled.

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My laptop is dead. Has been all weekend and is going into the doctor tomorrow, hopefully we’ll be up and running again soon. I’m borrowing J.’s right now so I can post my Best Shot Monday. I have one for Crafty Tuesday so far, too. So I’ll have try to update when I can.

I’m going through serious withdrawals right now. I won’t be able to read all of your blogs for a few days, but I’ll be back soon. Can you please say a little prayer for the quick recovery of my poor little Mac!