Dear Addikins -
As I was putting you to bed last night, I just couldn’t leave your room. You were nearly asleep, exhausted from your party, when I laid you down and covered you up. It was a rare moment, you letting me just stand there, stroking your hair and gazing at your sweet face as you drifted off to sleep.
It was a sweet pause before a pivotal moment in your life. It feels like you have been straddling the line between baby, toddler, and just plain “little girl” for so many months now.
You will tell me, “I’m not baby, I a big girl!” or “No, I do it!” And then in the next breath you ask me “Hold my hand, Mama.” Although you will always be my baby, and you’ll never be a “just plain” girl, I think you have definitely jumped across that line. You are all little girl. And I couldn’t help but think back to what I was doing 2 years ago at that same moment, when you became my “baby.”
I knew after I had my doctor’s appointment on the 8th of September and she “moved things along” a bit, that I was going to go into labor. I just had a feeling as we went out for dinner and I told your Daddy that we had better make sure the neighbors would be able to come over that night. I was so certain you were on your way.
I have to admit I was anxious, far more anxious than when we were waiting for Em to be born. I was unsure of how smoothly the transition from one baby to two was going to be. I was actually very scared, and worried that I just wouldn’t be able to be a mommy to two little girls as well as I could be to just one. And we had our comfortable routine already. Our family of three.
But the minute they put you in my arms, all of my fears, worries and anxieties disappeared. I knew that you were going to fit into our family perfectly. And you have given so much to our family in your two short years.
Since the day you were born, you and your sister have been fast friends. You have given Emma an opportunity to be a (great!) big sister. She has become a caring girl and is very aware of her job as a role model to her adoring “little sister.” You have taught her the importance of sharing and putting others first. The two of you make the most amazing, beautiful pair of girls and I know that no matter where your paths lead you, you will always have a best friend to rely on. That makes me and Daddy so proud.
And you have the most incredible sense of humor. Your faces and antics always have Daddy and I cracking up. You have just started to understand how funny you are, and you know how to use it to make us laugh. Just like a beam of sunshine, you shine laughter and happiness into a room just by being there.
Most importantly, you have made me a much better Mommy. With your curiosity and need to “check everything out, ” you have taught me to be more patient. I know this one still could use a little work…but I am much more patient than I used to be. When I look into those big eyes of yours, I have to catch my breath. I just want to make the world stop and soak in every sweet minute I have with you.
We still call you “tiny” although you and your personality are anything but that, now. It seems like quite a lot for such a “tiny” girl to have accomplished in two short years, but you have changed our family so that I cannot even begin to remember what it was like to be a family of three. You truly completed our family.
Happy Birthday, “Tiny.” May this next year be a constant source of wonder, happiness and love. And thank you for bringing all of these to our family, too.